If it is to be.....
Then it's up to me right?.... Short answer: absolutely! Because if a process that benefits you doesn't start with you, then who? All to often did (and sometimes I still do) have the expectations for a process to be started and reluctant to start or continue the same process by myself. Saving. School. Relationships. Friendships Etc. Butttttt.... while I can't speak with or for everyone, I'll give some advice: If it's not on a tight deadline; some progress is better than no progress. Practice makes better, not perfect. You are your biggest critic, so be nice to you. Eat, drink and sleep with tomorrow in mind.