incoming call from 1-800-manfuckyall

Scrapping with the bro's used to be something that I would avoid when I was younger.....
But now I'm like: "what's the best way to make them feel the way I do on a daily basis."
Rage, animosity, confusion....not giving a fuck about the way I feel about the abandonment from a decade ago. But just being free from the singular reality on the day to day was enough.
Friends creeping with my girls; girls trashing me with the niggas I'd dap up not knowing that these people were watching me struggling to maintain my sanity. Struggling to keep my head up. 

And when I find out, I get the: "I don't know how the conversation got started....." And "I just want to let you know..."

But I never found out what caused the niggas I'd give my last breath for, to cause them to burn me the way I think. So I now have to peep the moves made when they think I'm not looking. 
So the whole loyalty thing is one sided. I get cheated but I can't say anything about it because I might cause someone to kill themselves? What in the hell??

So now I have smile in people's faces, silently seething because no matter how much I love you and myself, I feel the betrayal. And the answer is always the same: "I only regret not telling you about it. That's how Kain explained it right? 'if your home boys girl throws the pussy at you; you are OBLIGATED to fuck her, as long as you tell him about it.'"

That's the hood mentality I have never understood. So I'm going to go get my life together. Because doing it with niggas is risky.

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